Tuesday, March 26, 2013

Refuting gay marriages

Refuting gay marriages
There have been various debates to the effect that gay marriages should be legalized. However, most religious leaders have maintained the argument that gay marriages are wrong. With this conflicting view of gay marriages, the writer, through this research paper seeks to explain why gay marriages are indeed wrong. The views represented are however, not a general representation but the writer’s own.
In the western world and even in other countries all over the world, it has always been common knowledge that marriage is meant for both a man and woman who commit towards spending their entire lives together. This is what has been ideally conceptualized to marriage with any other arrangement other than the above being a contradiction of how things are meant and were supposed to be. According to Doctor Benne and Doctor Mc Dermott, gay marriages are a key to permitting infidelity in relationships and marriages (Borroway, 2004).The effect of such kind of marriages would be that infidelity will tend to be the backbone of the commitment in marriages. Gay marriages advocate, Andrew Sullivan more than consents with this argument. He clearly relates ion his book that due tot the influence of gay marriages, there will be a greater desire for extra marital affairs between men than between spouses of the different sex. This is also strengthened by Troy Perry, a spokesman advocating for the same sex marriages who states that since they are not in a capacity to marry; different people have come up with different ideologies about what should constitute faithfulness (Corvino & Gallagher, 2012). To others, it encompasses having many spouses so long as there is openness when doing so. On the other hand however, the gay society has argued that the relationship between gay marriages and polygamy is very scant. Long before gay marriages were being advocated for and propagated, states like Utah had already legalized polygamy. In countries like Africa, this is a normal phenomenon. How then can gay marriages simply be equated to polygamy yet polygamy existed long before gay marriages were even recognized? However, the analysis by Mr. Andrew has been indeed proved correct through a survey conducted in the Netherlands .A country where gay marriages have been legalized. It was discovered that homosexual relationships would entail on the average, attest each man with about 8 other male partners in one year besides the relationship they have with their married gay partner! This is clear evidence that through permitting gay marriages, we would be making the society open to polygamy which is in fact rising at a very fast rate ( Andryszewski, 2007)
It should be clear knowledge that children are to be brought up in a proper family structure, consisting of a mother and father. Not two fathers or vice versa. How then can gay marriages be supported if they are detrimental to the upbringing of the children in the society? There is also a greater likelihood that the gay parents may deem it appropriate to molest the young children under their care. The article “child trends” clearly demonstrates that the structure in which children have been brought up is very important in their upbringing. The most beneficial structure as quoted by the article is the type that encompasses two parents, biologically related to the child and in a marriage that does not conflict the child understands (Eskridge&Spedale, 2007). In this regard therefore, it was consequently proved that children that had been brought up in gay families tend to suffer from gender disorientation, molestation and constantly have to witness homosexual love experiences from time to time. This is not only detrimental to their growth but also very detrimental to their emotional and psychological well being. Why then should we expose our young ones to situations that would evidently even disorient their understanding and lives in regards to sexuality.In this case therefore, the youngsters especially the teenagers will grow up with immense conflict regarding their sexuality. This is supported by the evidence related in the 1991 scientific survey conducted in males aged between 14-21 years old (Borroway, 2004).
The society will also not go unharmed by the pangs of gay marriages. As the situation currently states, the marriage institution is constantly suffering breakdowns, with many families divorcing and separating. Being that gay marriages also seek for family stability, there would be no reason as to why they marry. However, there effect on the families will be tremendous. Many spouses that have been unsure of their position in the relationship may find it easier to consider same sex relationships and thus disseminating the previous ties they had with their families. This is because through the introduction of the idea of gay marriages more uncertainty and instability is introduced in the already married couples who could be possibly going through a rough patch in their current situation. Instead of being encouraged to make it work, it will be encouraging them to walk away.
Gay marriages are to a greater part detrimental to the society but most especially to the children involved in the set up. It would not be fair to subject a child to such a family structure well knowing that they cannot adequately voice their concerns. Just a the gays have a right to life and to choosing their way of life, in that same  way also they should not subject young children to their way of life through adoption.

Borroway, J, (2004), Point by point: Refuting Benne and McDermott. Retrieved from            www.boxturtlebulletin.com/Articles/000,008.htm
Corvino,J,  Gallagher, M,(2012), Debating Same-Sex Marriage, Point counter point,          Pennsylvania, oxford university press.
 Andryszewski, T, (2007), Same sex marriage: Moral wrong or civil right? Exceptional social       studies titles for upper grades, New York, Twenty-First century books.
Eskridge,W,E, Jr.,  Spedale,D,R,(2007),Gay marriage for better or for worse?:What we’ve            learned from the evidence, Pennsylvania, oxford university press.